raptureofthemoon | Entries tagged with life

Ever since the time changed, I've had so much trouble motivating myself to work.

As it gets colder and the sunlight gets weaker and I keep my curtains drawn so my office is a gray and purple cocoon lit only by corner lamps...all I want to do is play video games. Specifically, at the moment, Minecraft.

I think it's my way of hibernating.

Which is fine for the weekends.

But extra frustrating during the week. I find myself going back and forth between working on course updates for half an hour then spending 10 to 15 minutes on our server.

Luckily, I'm not working on anything big at the moment. (And hopefully will not be working on anything big for the foreseeable future. (We've planned our 2026 to be focused more on updates to our course catalog than new development, with the new development that was already on the roster being done by our vendor and maybe our new hire.)

Unluckily, the work I am doing right now is fairly mentally tedious. Which makes it even harder to be engaged.

I suspect there's a little burnout too. Not just from work, but from lack of true downtime and the general state of the US and the world.

I'm really looking forward to five days off next week and my two weeks off in December.

Current Mood: restless

I forgot this place existed for a moment.

For all of my trying to slow down, once Halloween hit, I spent two weeks in a mental flurry. I'm not sure why. But between the election, my day in-office and trying to corral course updates, the days slipped by in a flash. And now it's about to be mid-November... This is my problem with being frenetically busy. I lose all track of the moment.

I spent the last week trying to recapture it. I've been slowly putting up winter/solstice/Christmas decorations since last weekend. My little white tree went up in its place on the bookcase (though it's currently naked). I have garlands and lights strung on multiple surfaces. I found a few new decorations from creators on Etsy that I'm excited about. Over the years I've been slowly adjusting my decor to be more nature oriented - foliage and wreathes and snowflakes and stars; of course, I'm keeping the hand me down decor from my mom, it just may not go up every year.

Tomorrow (or maybe later tonight - it's 4:30 in the afternoon, but thanks to the time change it already feels so late), I'll start decorating the tree. As soon as I can pinpoint where my lights got off to.

I decided to save this weekend for food prep, though I only got done not even half of what I had in mind. Saucy black beans for tacos (today) and to freeze for later use and chocolate granola. I left the hazelnuts in an obvious place to remind myself to make nutella. And when I get to the grocery store on Friday, I'll be focusing on meat and produce for present and future meals. Chuck roast for shredded green chile beef (date TBD), adobo shredded chicken to keep in batches in the freezer for ease of use (I may be trying out the crockpot for this one).

Meals and the ideas of meals take up so much of my mental space these days, between trying to eat well and keep up with my protein, I'm hoping if I start planning a little further ahead, I'll have less nights where I'm cranky and hating even the idea of thinking of what the prepare, let alone eat.

And speaking of meals, Thanksgiving is Friendsgiving, so I'm not thinking about what to cook. (Though I may make a dessert to take along. Yam Delight, perhaps.)

And I've already penciled in Dec 1st for PTO, so I'll have a nice five day break and I've planned off two weeks around Christmas. So I can actually get my staycation in this year and maybe invest in a little slow time to get my brain to come down from the stratosphere.

Current Mood: blank

Halloween was a moderate success. This year we gave out the small Tony's Chocolonely bars, ring pops and a mix of toys: plush spiders, bouncy balls shaped like bats and Halloween themed rubber ducks. The toys were a big hit. The chocolate...I think a lot of kids didn't realize it was there, even when pointed out. The ring pops were popular last year, mostly among the teenagers, of which we had fewer this year. Next year, I might do small grab bags and have the kids pick a toy.

By 8 p.m., we'd had what seemed to be the last trick or treaters, but as always we left the candy on the table so whoever might come by late could take what they wanted. We expect someone to make off with all the candy - that's fine. But this year...they also made off with the bowl the candy was in. Little shits. Take the candy, I don't care. Just leave the bowl.

Next year, I'll be using a cardboard box.

Saturday, November 1st. Samhain, still. Dia de los Muertos. All Saints Day. And the annual Halloween party. I always end up lazy by the end of October and whatever ideas I had for costumes have either gone out the proverbial window or have just not been acted upon, so I threw on some green eye shadow and glitter, green lipstick, a set of horns, spiderweb arm warmers and called myself a dark fairy who'd lost her wings.

Making up the night were food, sweets and old horror movies playing in the background. I finally watched Carnival of Souls all the way through. (I'd tried once, years ago, when I was a teenager, and couldn't hang with the pacing.)

Sunday, November 2nd. I did not realize it was the shift back to standard time until I woke up at 10 to 7 wondering why it was so bright outside. So I've been an hour off since yesterday morning. The "fall back" is definitely easier on the system than the "spring forward," but I'm still loopy and groggy and would rather we just stopped with the time changing nonsense.

Tomorrow, I have to go into the office for a Division meeting/my quarterly "in office" time. There's a lunch pot luck, which means I need to bake this afternoon.

I think today is going to be a wash on the work front. There are two meetings mid-day and I am struggling to get my brain moving. It's already 9:30. Luckily, I finished the work I needed to get done (in order to pass a storyboard off to our vendor) last week, so I'm back to "updates and tweaks" mode for our course catalog. Meaning, if I drag for the next couple of days, no one is really going to care.

Yay.

Current Mood: exhausted

a small grey robin, wings slightly spread, nestled in the grass

Sadly, she didn't make it.

Matt texted the wildlife rehab yesterday. She had a spinal injury and they had to euthanize her. Seems like maybe she did hit a window. It might not have been ours (she was propelling herself pretty well along the ground at one point so it's possible she could have come from our neighbor's yard)...but still, I think I'll be looking into some anti-collision devices.

This is the second bird vs window this year. The first bird I found dead in the backyard, near the library window. (Granted, this is the first year since we've been in the house that I've found evidence of birds hitting our windows, so hopefully it doesn't and won't happen often.)

Current Mood: contemplative

Today was vaccine day. It's practically a morning date. Matt and I both set up appointments at the pharmacy for our flu and Covid vaccines. He also got an MMR because he's not entirely sure if he ever got that second shot, and considering the way people in the U.S. are trying to Make Measles Great Again, better safe than sorry. (I know I got my second MMR shot. I have my lovely yellow, military-brat immunization record that my mother gave to me when I moved out. But I still contemplate getting another one...just in case. Not today, though.)

I get the Covid vaccine in my left arm, the flu in my right. The very first set of Covid vaccines (April and May, 2021), made the lymph node under my left arm swell. And it got stuck that way for months, resulting in my first official mammogram. It eventually shrank back to mostly normal, but it still flares with every new Covid vaccine, so I figured instead of having a potentially wonky lymph node under both arms, I'd just keep torturing that one. But I prefer not to double up vaccines in that arm when I get the Covid shot...so both arms it is. I like to spread the pain around. It's a good thing I sleep on my back.

I'm also counting down the time to when I start feeling side effects. The second shot of the initial set of Covid vaccines gave me a fever, body aches and chills and that pattern has continued, slightly less each time. But still enough to make me curl up on the couch with several blankets and a mug of tea.

I'm already feeling fatigue, though that could be from the not quite six and a half hours of sleep I got last night, combined with the bird rescue we had to do after the vaccine.

Before we headed to the pharmacy, I heard a skittering in the leaves and seed pods in our front yard, looked over and saw a grey ball of feathers. At first I thought she was sunning herself, but when I took a step closer and she didn't fly off, I realized something was wrong. I started looking up wildlife rehab places on the way to the pharmacy, figuring we'd try to take her somewhere if she was still there and alert by the time we got back,

She was.

a small grey bird crouched in the grass

What followed was a series of texts to the rehab, complete with pictures and video so they could assess the bird's condition and then an appointment for drop off a few hours later.

We got her into a shoebox with a few towels and placed the box in a warm spot. Matt checked on her right before we left to make sure she was, in fact, still among the living. She turned one dark eye toward him and smacked the side of the box with her wing.

At the rehab, they had us wait in our car. One of the volunteers came out in scrubs, gloves and a mask. They're taking bird flu seriously. They conduct their initial exam of the bird outside. They gave us an intake number and said to give them 72 hours before checking in (if we hadn't heard from them by that point). Head injuries (we're working on the assumption she hit a window) are a 72 hour, make or break.

So here's hoping she'll pull through.

But if not, at least she was able to go somewhere safe and warm for whatever time she has left.

Current Mood: tired

Today was the day I was going to buckle down and start plugging images into my storyboard so I can hand it off to the vendor (hopefully) by the end of this week.

But with the AWS outage, I can't access Adobe Stock with any sort of reliability. Which means, I can't complete this storyboard. I guess I can just go through and slap in the slide template numbers. And then work on accessibility on another set of courses (though I'd be loathe to publish them, given that software is also cloud based and uses AWS.)

This is all so...stupid.

I'm in the kitchen, chopping onions for 15 bean soup. Portishead plays from the library. Outside the kitchen window, the sun sparkles off the golden leaves falling from the ash trees. Behind me, Matt swears softly as he puts together a Wayfair pantry.

The scene is strangely nostalgic, as if it or something similar has played out many times before.

I take a moment to think about it. It has.

Front and center in my life as an adult, being the person in the kitchen, behind the menus and the music choices.

Adjacent in my life as a child and teenager. How many years did I spend watching or listening to my mom cooking, while music or the TV - Star Trek: The Original Series, or Highlander, or Quantum Leap - played from the living room.

There are so many moments these days that splice past and present. I'm not sure whether it's me being maudlin or just a side effect of growing older.

I can be cooking chicken and rice and flash back to any random weeknight dinner in high school with my mom setting the same dish on the table.

The lyric of a song I haven't listened to in years puts me in my old granny-hand-me-down Buick, driving to see Matt after an afternoon class.

The sunlight slants a certain way through the leaves and I'm with my dad in the hills around Oberkail, having a picnic and watching the sunlight and shadow roll over the fields.

A deep blue and cloudless midsummer sky takes me to Phoenix, long summer days by the pool, three night sleepovers with my bestie, late nights reading, writing, dreaming.

So often, these days, I find myself thinking: where the hell did all the time go?

And then one of these flashes happens.

And the hours and weeks, months and years and all the things contained within them come back to me.

Time hasn't disappeared. It's been spent.

Current Mood: thoughtful

Busy at work again. It's not a steady busyness, it's a scattered busyness. Too many projects in too many areas in too many languages, all which need finalizing or touch ups (from important content to cosmetic) interspersed with doing interviews this week and last, and it just becomes so much white noise in my head.

It's my least favorite thing about the work I do, where I do it. This type of busyness. It bleeds into my life outside of work. It keeps my mind spinning in preparation for the next day, the next week.

Which is why I'm here, writing this entry, trying to steal back a little steadiness. But loading up this journal was also a reminder that I got sidetracked from the last moment I spent here. When I selected "post" I was confronted with my unfinished entry I started last Friday. So I'll finish it now.

From

thefridayfive

1. ... things you can't live without.

Time to myself.

I'm not only an introvert, but I'm also an only child. I grew up very good at entertaining myself and being comfortable in my own company. Even in my 40s, I'm still working hard to find a balance between relationships with others and my relationship with myself. How much time do I exert outward? How much time inward?

2. ... of the best moments in your life.

Part of me wants to say the day I got married... But it's not so much the day I got married as that brief, intangible moment when it settled in me that I'd found someone I wanted to partner with in life. My husband and I have been together for 22 years. We moved in together after four years of dating (once I'd graduated college). Sometime in between that fourth year and the eighth (when we got married), came that moment.

Another best moment is seemingly surface level but there's hidden depth. For my high school graduation present, my parents took me to San Antonio to see The Phantom of the Opera at the Majestic Theatre. I dragged my best friend along with me. San Antonio itself was fun to explore but the Majestic was beautiful. And the musical? Well, I'd been listening to the original cast soundtrack for two or three years at that point, so I knew the thing by heart but I fell in love all over again hearing and seeing Ted Keegan as the Phantom.

3. ... celebrities you can't stand.

Right wing conservative podcasters/influencers. I don't think I need to delineate. They're all white cloth cutouts.

4. ... books you enjoy(ed) reading.

There are so many to choose from, but I'll pull a few from my top tier list of books I often reread.

Poppy Z. Brite's (Billy Martin) Lost Souls for its poetic language and new to me, at least, take on vampires.

Patricia McKillip's (RIP) Something Rich and Strange written for the Froud Faerielands series, which I first read when I was maybe 12 or 13 and which left an indelible mark with the use of language and the ecological themes.

Peter S. Beagle's Tamsin for its prose, his characterization of teen girls with cat best friends and the beautiful and hauntingly fun story.

Susan Kay's Phantom for taking what was a somewhat flat ghost story and spinning it into a gothic tale of grief, loss, love.

5. ... items in your purse/backpack/on your desk.

In my purse, which is a medium sized messenger bag, I have the expected: my wallet, my keys.

There are a small handful of errant pens (because one never knows when one needs to write longhand).

When I'm actually leaving my house, into the bag goes my phone, and either a physical book or a notebook of some type or my Remarkable tablet, depending on what medium I feel like writing in.

Current Mood: scattered

The high today should be 72℉ and it's currently a beautiful 58. I have my office window open to let in the air and light.

Today is my off-Friday. And in the pattern of slowing things down, I'm meeting and treating a (now) former coworker to coffee this afternoon. She retired at the end of September. I haven't actually seen her in person since before we all went home to work in March of 2020. I've seen her face online just a few times. Beyond that, we've texted sporadically. We clicked pretty well as soon as I started this job and were fast compatriots on the myopic idiocy of electing a fascist once (let alone twice) as well as the abject nonsense we watched happening during the height of the pandemic.

It'll be good to catch up.

Tomorrow evening is another friend group social event but the day and Sunday are my own.

And I have a to-do list that just keeps growing. Mulch to order and sheet mulching to do, plants to cut back, patios to clean, Halloween goodies to get.

More realistically, my pattern seems to be slowing down then speeding up to catch up on things that just keep getting away from me when I slow down. The seasonal changes wait for no woman.

Fright Night (2011) picture prompt short.

Dishonored short. (Still needs an ending.)

Half of "Show Me Where It Hurts," part of my Fallout 3 series Shaking the Bough. (Which will probably be eternally on going because there are always new stories to be found in the Capital Wasteland.)

Also, I want this for my apartment.

Current Mood: tired
Crossposts: http://sanguineroses.livejournal.com/959761.html

So, it's been about a year since I wrote anything here.

Don't worry. You haven't missed much.

My previous employer finally crashed. I received a small check last September. No word on work until December. By that time, I'd filed for unemployment and was then, officially, off the payroll. I completed a job for them (as a contractor) from about mid December to March. It's still not fully completed/paid up, so I don't have a check for that final bit of work yet. (I get in contact with the PM every couple of weeks.)

I worked another contract job for a former coworker from May to July. I'm really hoping he might be able to get me on full time come the new year, but I'm not counting my chickens.

To top it off, the Knoxville job market fucking sucks for my industry. In the event that there is a job that speaks to me, I'm sure there are twenty other people applying for it.

I spent this afternoon at a temp agency; I'm hoping for at least some part time work so I can get something coming in. I'm going to drop an e-mail to another agency contact I made back in the spring. And I have a few jobs saved to apply for this week.

Luckily, Matt's job is good and steady and *knocks on wood* doesn't look like it's going anywhere.

So, yeah. While I'm good at getting on with things (and Matt's encouraging me not to worry about money), I'm under a constant miasma of stress. I can bury it for the most part, but it's still there.

So, that is what it is.

In other news:

I've gotten into the Supernatural fandom. (What took me so long?) If you're interested in fannish works, you can visit my Tumblr: Ilcuoreardendo-fic

I spent some time down in St. Augustine at the end of July. That was beautiful. I need to live on the coast....

And I'm gearing up for a potential NaNo 2013 participation. I used to have some of you LiveJournalers as writing buddies. I've since changed my name. You can find me here, if you're so inclined: Sangetencre.

And that's about it.

I guess I'll see you next year....

Crossposts: http://sanguineroses.livejournal.com/958958.html

I have so many homes on the Internet, it's hard to live in all of them. Anyone on Tumblr, in addition to DW/LJ?

You can find my Tumblr home over here.

I've been doing more scheduled blogging over at Chaotically Yours.

Lately, that includes:

Waxing fangirly about the remake of Fright Night.

Which I, surprisingly, enjoyed. I'd intended to see it when it came out in the theatre back in Aug/Sept and then I completely forgot about it. Of course, once I learned David Tennant was playing Peter Vincent, I sought out a copy, immediately.

I'm also now playing around with Peter Vincent/Charley Brewster fic, in part because I fell into a funk the other day and writing brain candy fanfic always seems to help me feel better. (I'll probably mention it here if I ever get around to sharing.)

Also, in other fandom news, I got a TARDIS key necklace:

So, no more worrying about being locked out of the phone box.

Crossposts: http://sanguineroses.livejournal.com/957933.html

Despite the fact that it's Tuesday.

Tomorrow, I "go back to work" after two weeks off. I put the phrase in quotes because, well, I don't actually go anywhere with the whole working-from-home thing. Hell, some days, I'm lucky I make it out of my pajamas. (Maybe I should have made a New Year's resolution regarding getting dressed everyday...)

Regardless, it still drops me into the typical Sunday-mood, lamenting the end of my time off.

I think it's exacerbated this time around since I've been sick since the 24th and spent most of this last week on the couch, drinking tea and Theraflu and trying to avoid coughing fits, so I haven't done anything I thought I might do while having time off.

Hell, I should be honest with myself. I probably wouldn't have gotten much done even if I hadn't felt like a used tissue (ragged and snotty) most of the time. The fact is, I usually am more creatively productive when I have other (mundane, daily) obligations poking at me. (It stems partly from some internal juvenile rebellion I never managed to shake.)

I do this to myself after every scheduled vacation. Lament the end of it, bemoan having to go back to work, console myself with my Furlough Fridays and the slow procession of us gaining new projects (a double edged sword; I'd take the shitloads of work over having no income, of course), which means I have additional time--to myself--to get to the things I didn't get to during my vacation.

So, with that in mind, I'm setting a goal, for this Friday, of making the last few tweaks to an old short story I just had my new writers group critique; I doubt it'll go out this weekend, but it needs to be readied.

Beyond that, I'm going to get back in the groove of scribbling in my impossible things journal, responding to writing prompts over in the blogspot community, and continuing on with drafting vignettes for Dispatches from New Vegas.

I've managed to avoid it for the last two winters, but this year it seems bad luck caught up with me - I woke up yesterday morning feeling off and by 7 a.m. this morning it seems to have developed into an actual cold. Though it seems to be rather mild.

For that, I'm thankful, as it hasn't totally ruined my sense of smell/taste, so I was able to cook dinner (my first time for this holiday - normally we spend the day with my parents) and enjoy the outcome.

And now, I'm thinking a glass of wine might be in order.

I'd planned to veg out with video games today, since we finally got everything (Steam & non Steam games) set up again after installing Win 7 on my desktop. [As an aside, Microsoft's Games for Windows Live can go gnaw on a porpoise.] But I'm not sure I have the energy or attention span--or, come to think of it, the equilibrium--so I may fall back on movies (though I've already watched so many - last night I had an AVP/Predator fest) and a re-read of a favorite book (Emma Bull's War for the Oaks) that M got me.

Scribbling may also be a possibility...but having a foggy head, I won't put much stock in that idea at this point.

Current Mood: sick

I went to bed and to sleep around 10:00.

And what happens?

I pop wide awake at 12:30 and I'm still freaking up...

Attempted to type some NaNo stuff (admittedly, I'm half assing a short story collection with a theme of 'tween places; half assing might even be too generous a term) and found myself more annoyed than usual with the crap!first draft, spurred in part, probably by the frustration of not being able to get back to sleep. (It threw me into one of those "I can't write worth shit" spins, in fact.). So I just let it be.

It's 20 to 4....I'd really like to sleep.

The other day, I finally got to watch (as in sit down and pay attention to rather than just have it playing in the background and occasionally look up and admire the pretty scenery) Alice in Wonderland.

I've technically seen it several times; this time, I finally got to enjoy the little details and pick up on dialogue I missed.

And I enjoy it. Very much. Yes, the ending is a little stilted and formulaic with the not-so-epic epic-battle, but the scenery? The characters? The Hatter's characterization (and the brogue)? I love.

And look who I get to carry around in my bag now...

I've been pondering a type of people. You know... The type that you constantly have to get in contact with if you want to talk with them or see them, because phones/internet/etc. only go one way? (Which, eventually, leads to you doing all of the work in order to maintain the relationship.)

I was thinking of it somewhat in relation to this informal group of friends/acquaintances we've been hanging out with, on Sunday mornings, at the coffee shop, for the last three or four years. We've seen them occasionally outside the coffee shop--had dinner a time or two, gone to a couple people's houses for get-togethers--so it's enough of an acquaintanceship to be considered friendship-lite....I suppose.

And I expect that a few of them will probably be upset that we haven't been back by the coffee shop to say goodbye before we move (next Friday/Saturday). Due in large part, of course, to the business of moving and the fact that Sunday is our day to sleep in, right now, since Saturday tends to be for errands and other things.

Anyway, at the thought of them possibly being upset, my mind immediately shot to: Well, you know where to find me. You have me on Facebook. You have my phone number. And you know, generally, where I live. If a goodbye is important enough that you'll be upset if it doesn't happen in person? You can contact me and we can arrange, even, a fifteen minute slot of time between my packing and cleaning.

I try to give people the benefit of the doubt...because, in adulthood? Life is busy. And once you're done with the daily grind (work, errands, cleaning, cooking, etc.) and finding time for yourself, then you try to find time for others. And it doesn't always work. I know that.

Still it takes two people to maintain some kind of relationship. Occasionally the balance is going to shift, making one person do a little more work...and that's o.k. That's fine; that's how relationships flow; it's not always a perfect 50-50. But when that balance is always shifted to one person? It gets a little old.

I suppose that's why I don't really attempt to make long lasting, one-on-one friendships...most of the time. (Which was always kind of hard to do, anyway, being a military brat and moving around so often. I cherish the friendships I've been able to keep, even if they're down to virtual interactions now due to distance.) Invariably, I seem to end up in the role of doing most of the heavy lifting. And I just don't have the will to do that anymore. I'll try--give it a good faith effort--but I don't keep trying; not like I used to. I can't do that to myself.

I suppose, I do and will take the acquaintanceship, as it comes...

But if people want to truly be in my life as friends rather than mere acquaintances?

They'll need to share the effort.

Led to a power outage of about an hour, which ultimately led to my staying up until 4 a.m. (the power was back on, but after the rush and flow of rain and winds, I couldn't get myself to sleep), which led to my sleeping through all four (count 'em four) alarms this morning.

I woke up by 10:30, fed the cats, flipped on the coffee pot, and went straight to booting up the computer (saved from last night's outage by the UPS, though I had to do a hard shutdown because Windows was pulling it's "ooh shiny" routine), and thankfully didn't have any e-mails from work waiting on me. So, I was able to jump into what I already knew I needed to get done today.

Now it's nearly 4 o'clock, I've done what I can day-job wise, I'm still in my pajamas, I've only had one cup of coffee, I've scribbled a rough draft of something that I may send over to Six Sentences, and I've tinkered around in photoshop...

I think I need another shower to make myself feel like a real person, though. And then some food...because I've forgotten to eat. *sigh* And then, some kind of plan/schedule because otherwise I may end up whittling away the evening hours playing BioShock.

Oh, and: LJ Friends take note, if any of you who don't have one would like a Dreamwidth account, I have more Invite Codes. Just let me know.

I recently bought Lily Holbrook's Wicked Ways.

And it has been living in my car for the last week. It's absolutely gorgeous. Melodic and haunting. And there's a nostalgic quality to it that I can't really explain.

One of the songs I'm particularly taken with is "Sweet Little Girl," which you can listen to here.

There is evil in these woods
Where she brought you to the edge
Touched your heart and then it bled
Trickling down, down, down

There's a fever in your head
Rising when she calls your name
On your lips, her kiss of death
Takes you down, down, down...

This album is going in my "Soundtracks for Writing" pile.

Today, I: finished my holiday shopping (which is good, because we're having Xmas at my parents tomorrow), re-supplied the cats with necessities, picked up some minor groceries, made potato soup, and gave a thorough proof and edit--followed by formatting and skill highlighting suggestions--of my aunt's resume. (And it still feels really odd to me to have an older family member coming to me for job seeking advice. It makes me realize my age. Well, not just my age, there are accomplishments in there as well. But, you know. I'm 27. I still feel about 16 on most days... On bad days, I'm about 12.)

And now I'm sitting here, sipping Twining's Yuletide Toddy, catching the replay of the local news, and contemplating the mind whirls of my characters and characters that are not and will never be mine (alas).

Despite all this pondering, I haven't written much of anything lately. A few sentences here. A creepy, obsessive, stalkerish Sylar/Mohinder fanfic there. (God, that was two weeks ago already...)

With work still molasses-slow and my not hearing anything about the proposal for which we were supposed to have a decision this week, I'm thinking we've pretty much sailed into dire straits now...

I may still have a job by the time New Year rolls around. But I don't know for how much longer after that.

And with the miasma this kind of information creates, it's really hard to concentrate much on words. Any words. Though I have slightly better luck when the words are in something for which I can receive pretty quick gratification (hence the creepy fanfic).

I've been sitting here staring at the screen for the last few minutes, writing nothing. That means I've lost whatever train of thought I had and it's time to shut up and move on to indulging my brain with something pretty.

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ilcuoreardendo (Lins)

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Dreaming through the noise.

Writing through the haze.

Entries tagged with life

shift in light, shift in mood

November in a Fugue

Seasons and shifts

The Robin

Vaccines and Injured Birds

Well, then...

a flash of life

Descents and delays

Off Friday

iWrite & Inspiration

Hiiiiiiiiiiii. Fandom. NaNoWriMo.

Of Vampires and TARDIS Keys

I have a case of the Sundays.

Deck the Halls with Humidifiers....

For once, I was being a good girl.

In randomosity...

You know where to find me.

The tremendous thunderstorm last night....

Of Aesthetics

Damn you, sleeplessness...